Is happiness overrated?
In recent years, we’ve been hearing a lot about happiness and how to achieve it. Has the pursuit of happiness become overrated? As human beings, we are designed to feel a number of emotions and happiness is just one of them. It’s sought after because it provides a pleasurable experience, but then is it humanly possible to feel happy all the time? Or is it wanting to be happy all the time, that could be making us unhappy? Let’s put happiness under the lens.
What is happiness?
In simple words, happiness is a positive emotional state characterized by feelings of joy, contentment, and satisfaction. It is often associated with experiences that bring pleasure or a sense of fulfillment, and can also come from a sense of purpose, connection with others, or simply appreciating the present moment.
Let’s understand how our body experiences happiness. You’ve probably heard of dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins – these are the chemicals in our brains that make us feel good. When we do something pleasurable, like eat chocolate or win a match, our brains release these chemicals, and we experience a temporary high. But here’s the thing: this high doesn’t last forever. Eventually, our brains adjust to the new normal (new normal being, the accomplishment becomes a part of your life) It is the same with all events, only the duration of the feeling of happiness may vary slightly.
A study by psychologists Daniel Kahneman and Barbara Frederickson found that while participants predicted that a positive event, like getting a promotion or winning the lottery, would make them happy for a long time, the actual happiness boost was much shorter than they anticipated. This phenomenon is called “hedonic adaptation.” It means that we quickly get used to our new circumstances and return to our baseline level of happiness.
Is it ideal to pursue happiness?
We can’t expect to be happy all the time, even though moments of happiness are great. Pursuing happiness continuously would mean that we prioritize pleasure above everything else. However, we all know that even if we set out to do things that give us pleasure, we might not always be successful in accomplishing what we hoped for. For example, in a competition, there are at least two parties, and only one can win, while the other must experience failure, regardless of how much they intended to win and experience pleasure afterward. Although hard work with anticipation of achieving something is important, it’s crucial to remember that failure is part of the journey.
Failure and disappointment are natural and inevitable parts of life. Experiencing negative emotions like sadness or frustration doesn’t mean that we’re failing or that we won’t experience happiness in the future. Setbacks and challenges can often be opportunities for growth and learning.
Feeling other emotions besides happiness is important for our overall well-being and personal growth as well. For instance, sadness can help us process grief and loss, anger can motivate us to take action and make changes, and fear can keep us safe in dangerous situations. Additionally, experiencing a range of emotions can help us build empathy and connect with others on a deeper level.
So, should we give up on the pursuit of happiness entirely?
Of course not. Happiness is an essential part of life, and it’s worth pursuing. However, we need to recognize that it’s not the only thing that matters. All emotions, positive and negative, are part of the human experience, and we can learn and grow from all of them.
In fact, some philosophers argue that a life without pain and suffering would be meaningless. The philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche wrote, “To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.” This might sound pessimistic, but it’s actually a call to embrace the full spectrum of human experience, to recognize that both joy and sorrow are valuable in their own way.
Studies show that pursuing happiness alone in a self-centred or hedonistic way can actually be counterproductive, leading to feelings of emptiness and dissatisfaction. Instead, a more balanced approach to pursuing happiness that prioritizes personal growth, connection with others, and contributing to the world in a meaningful way is likely to be more effective in promoting lasting well-being.
In short, we need to go through many emotions, and feeling happy all the time is not possible or ideal. Let’s focus on cultivating resilience, contentment, and a sense of purpose that goes beyond momentary pleasure.